Anticipatory Anxiety: How to Stop Worrying About the Future

Last updated October 14, 2021

Anticipatory anxiety is when we worry about the future. When we are faced with unprecedented experiences such as the one we are living through right now, it is very easy to focus on all the negatives and to tap into our inner pessimist. This anxiety mind hack can help give you a more balanced outlook as to what the future might hold.  

Mind hack: Preparing for the future

In this exercise you will need three chairs (or places to sit) and a pen & paper. One chair will represent the positive outlook and one chair represents the pessimist. We’ll start with your inner pessimist and then move onto your optimistic self. Whilst you are doing this, tune into what it feels like during and after each step.

Before we start, it’s important to realise that the aim of this is not to be a Pollyanna. Whilst it is not helpful to be overly pessimistic it is also just as unhelpful to be overly optimistic. The aim of this exercise is to build more awareness around the benefits of each state as well as the drawbacks.  

Step 1: Your inner pessimist. 

Whilst you are sitting in one of the chairs ask and answer the following questions from a pessimistic viewpoint. Remember that pessimists have a bleak outlook seeing things as very personal, more permanent and pervasive, so answer as negatively as you can.

First, the past:

• What happened this week that was so bad?

• What negative or unpleasant emotions showed up?

• What things annoyed you?

• What difficulties did you face at work?

• What was challenging at home?

• What was one thing that disappointed you about yourself?

Now the future:

• What bad things might be going to happen over the next few weeks?

• What negative or unpleasant emotions show up?

• What is annoying, frustrating or frightening you?

• What difficulties will you face at work?

• What will be challenging at home?

• How will you fail?

Take some time to let yourself answer these questions - you can write them down if you like.

Let yourself fully feel what it is like to fully step into the role of a true pessimist even when you have an optimistic nature. It can be revealing.

Step 2: Ever the optimist

Move to the other chair. Remember that optimists often have an unrealistically, relentlessly positive outlook and that is what we are aiming for here. This kind of optimist sees life as less personal, less permanent and less pervasive. Do not temper this positive approach with any negativity or reality checks and balances. 

The past:

• What was good about what happened last week?

• What pleasant and positive emotions showed up?

• What inspired and made you feel excited, happy and joyful?

• What worked well at work?

• What good things happened at home?

• What is one thing that made you feel proud of yourself?

The future:

• What good things might be going to happen over the next few weeks?

• What positive and pleasant emotions show up?

• What will make you feel excited, happy and joyful?

• What positive things will you experience at work?

• What will be great at home?

• How will you succeed?

Step 3: Evaluation and reflection

Now move to a different chair from either of the ones used in this exercise. Ask yourself the following question, be sure to write these thoughts down: 

• How did it feel to embody fully a pessimistic mindset? 
  What else did you notice?

• How did it feel to fully embody an optimistic mindset? 
  What else did you notice?

• What did you learn from the overall exercise?

• How could you use this in your daily life?

• What will you do in relation to the near future?
  In other words, how will you apply your learning to the uncertainty our future holds right now?

When you are finished read back through your notes, this will help you consider and process them more fully.

By doing this exercise to manage anticipatory anxiety, you are becoming fully empowered to be the author of your own life - how you show up and how you embrace both the negative and positives in any given situation.

Keep practising and be kind to yourself. This will pass and when it does, you’ll be ready to adapt and prepare for another big change. 

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