The Imbalance Within: How Overvaluing and Undervaluing Aspects of Work-Life Leads to Stress and Burnout

We all experience recurring patterns in our work and personal lives. These patterns, often driven by how we prioritise different aspects of our lives, can either contribute to our well-being or lead to significant stress and burnout. What happens when we consistently overvalue certain aspects of our work life while undervaluing others? The result is often an imbalance that has significant consequences. It's a delicate balancing act, and the impact can be profound when it's off.

It's important to remember that the examples below are just some ways we can over or undervalue aspects of our lives. The specific imbalances will vary from person to person, and what's considered "over" or "under" will also depend on individual circumstances and priorities.

Let's explore some common imbalances and how they contribute to that all-too-familiar feeling of being overwhelmed:

1. The Time Thief: Undervaluing Your Time

How often do you say "yes" when you really mean "no"? Undervaluing your time is a recipe for disaster. Constantly putting others' needs before your own, neglecting self-care, and failing to set boundaries lead to a packed schedule and a depleted energy tank. You end up feeling rushed, stressed, and resentful. Your time is your most precious resource; learn to protect it.

2. The People Pleaser's Burden: Overvaluing Expectations of Others

Seeking approval is human, but when it becomes the driving force behind your actions, you risk burnout and overvalue the expectations of others. You try to please everyone, often at the expense of your own needs and desires. This can lead to feeling like you're living your life for everyone else, leaving you empty and unfulfilled.

3. The Ripple Effect: Undervaluing Consequences

We've all been there – making a quick decision without fully considering the repercussions. Undervaluing the consequences of our choices, whether big or small, can lead to a cascade of problems. Ignoring the potential fallout can create unnecessary stress and anxiety as you grapple with the unintended consequences. Taking the time to weigh your options and consider the potential outcomes is crucial for minimising stress and making informed decisions.

4. The Relentless Improver: Overvaluing Improvement

The desire to improve is a good thing, but it can be detrimental when it becomes an obsession. Constantly striving for better and never being satisfied with the present can lead to chronic stress and a feeling of never being good enough. It's important to appreciate your accomplishments and find contentment in the journey, not just the destination.

5. The Perfectionist's Trap: Overvaluing Perfection

Perfection is an illusion. Chasing it is a surefire way to burn out. Overvaluing perfection leads to procrastination, self-criticism, and a constant fear of failure. It creates a cycle of stress and anxiety as you strive for an unattainable ideal. Embrace imperfection, learn from your mistakes, and focus on progress rather than perfection.

Beyond These Examples:

Remember, these are just a few examples. You might be overvaluing material possessions, your career, or even the opinions of social media strangers. Conversely, you might undervalue your health, relationships, or creative pursuits. The key is to assess your life and identify where the imbalances lie.

Increasing Your Awareness and Interrupting Patterns:

The first step to addressing these imbalances is increasing your awareness. This involves taking stock of the patterns that are showing up in your work and personal life. Learning about these patterns requires reflection and asking yourself key questions:

• What triggered this pattern? What specific event or situation led to this reaction?

• What did I think and feel when I was triggered? What were my immediate thoughts and emotions?

• What did I do next? What actions did I take as a result of those thoughts and feelings?

• What were the consequences of these actions? Consider both the negative and positive outcomes.

By consistently reflecting on these questions, you can identify the recurring patterns undermining your well-being and contributing to stress and burnout. Once you have a handle on these patterns, the next step is to learn to interrupt them. This might involve setting boundaries, prioritising tasks, practising self-care, or reframing your thinking. It's a process of conscious effort and consistent practice, but the rewards – a more balanced and fulfilling life – are well worth it.

If you want to find out more about career coaching, take a look or get in touch. Book a consultation, and we can work together to find where career coaching might take you.

Continue reading the Work-Life Integration series…