How to Give Your Boss Honest Feedback

Last updated August 7, 2021

There is so much written about being a good leader, but before you can learn how to be a good leader you must first learn how to be a good follower. One way to be a good follower is to learn how to ‘manage up’ and give honest feedback to your boss. This is a vital skill when you have a problem at work you need to raise with your manager or boss.

I have spoken before about the value of how being a good follower at work can increase your happiness, both in and outside of work.

The following five techniques will help you put the art of being a good follower into practice.

1. Create a great relationship with your boss, no matter their leadership style

One reason people come to me is that they don’t get along with their boss. If you feel that your boss is a micromanager, makes unreasonable demands or is unclear on their priorities, then you’re sure to feel the same way. As a career coach, it’s a recurring theme I’ve seen countless times. When we dig deeper, I often find it’s because they don’t feel like their boss is listening to them and they don’t know the best way to discuss these issues with them.

It may seem obvious, but your manager holds your career in their hands. Unless you want to continue feeling undervalued and underappreciated at work, you must learn how to build a good relationship with your superiors. It will enable you to progress your career and feel good about going to work.

In Leadership is Half the Story, authors Marc & Samantha Hurwitz discuss five areas that you need to develop to create an effective partnership with your boss:

• Decision advocating – how you can add value to the decision-making process, even when it’s not your call to make.

• Peak performing – being responsible for your level of engagement, development and performance.

• Organisational agility - aligning and thriving within the broader organisation.

• Dashboard communicating – keeping your boss well informed and stimulating the right leadership action.

• Relationship building – developing rapport, trust and an understanding of how to work best with leadership.

It’s great advice for anyone – no matter what rung on the career ladder you’re currently on or hope to reach – who is keen to improve their relationship with their boss.

After all, many different reasons lead people to feel they can’t talk to their boss. Whatever they may be though, there is a common cause: not knowing how to effectively communicate and create a partnership with your boss.

2. Learn how to be a good follower

It should be simple. Perhaps your boss announces a new procedure or system, and you realise that it will hurt your work. You tell your boss, but nothing changes, and you’re left dealing with the consequences. 

Firstly, try and see things from your boss’s point of view. They not only have to manage their employees, but they also have to please their superiors. For you to be successful at work, learn what is important to your boss.

What are their goals and objectives? Then figure out how you fit into that.

When you’re seen to be a supportive employee, your boss is more likely to listen to your feedback.

3. Take a step back and see the big picture

You’re probably only seeing part of the big picture, not all of it. That means any time you’ve given feedback to your boss in the past, it may not have been ignored like you may have thought. Other factors may have been at play. Good managers are fully aware that people don’t like change and will take this into account whenever possible.

However, successful businesses don’t stay static for long. They must constantly adapt and change to thrive. Managers sometimes must make trade-offs to meet business objectives. That may mean doing something that has a negative impact in one area of the business for greater gain in another.

When the next big change is implemented, try to see how this affects the overall business and not just your role, team or department. From this vantage point, you’ll have a clearer view of how you can help the business succeed.

Change brings conflict. But this is also a good time for you to test your skills as a good follower and demonstrate you have leadership potential. 

4. Don’t get drawn into office politics

Your boss isn’t the only person you have to get along with at work. How well you work with others also has a huge bearing on how you are seen in the workplace, both by your colleagues and by your boss. You may notice that some people have no problem putting their point of view across in meetings. Others will have a good moan at break time. 

It can be tempting to join in the office gossip. But if you want your boss to trust you and listen when you have feedback to give, you need to set your line in the sand. When others attempt to pull you in, lend a supportive ear but keep in mind that you cannot control others, you can only control yourself.

This will demonstrate to your boss that you have good judgement, so they see you in a positive light.

This will help you immensely when you find your self in a situation where you need to give feedback to your boss as they will depend upon you as a reliable source of information.

5. Choosing the right time and place to give feedback to your boss

So, you’re in a familiar situation again and feel you need to have an honest and open conversation with your boss. Your stomach fills with dread.

Will they listen this time? Or will I get brushed aside?

Put these negative emotions to one side and focus on the positive steps you can take.

Unless you have the kind of team dynamic where active debate is valued, don’t jump on the bandwagon and start criticising your boss’s decisions – especially when their superiors are present. Nothing will get their guard up quicker. Just remember, you wouldn’t like to be criticised in a public forum. Chances are your boss won’t either.

Instead, make a note of your concerns. You may find with a little time that the issue isn’t as pressing as you first thought. It’ll also give you time to come up with possible solutions.

Once you have had time to consider your problem from every angle, schedule a convenient time to meet one-on-one with your boss. This means you will have their full attention. It will also allow you to get your point of view across without being side-tracked by others.

One of the most important things you can do is to stick to the facts without becoming overly emotional or blindly speculating. Instead, just state your case from your view on the ground floor.

Be sure to put forward any possible workarounds. Your boss will appreciate that you are showing initiative. They will also appreciate that you’re putting the business first, as well as presenting them with possible solutions, not just problems. These are all valuable skills great leaders have.

They may not act on your solutions. But they may share more background information with you to help you understand the business decision. With time, your boss will come to see you as someone they can count on. And delegate to. This will lead to you being more involved in business decisions.

Over time, you’ll learn how to be a better follower at work which will lead to you becoming a great leader.

Find out more about how to ‘manage up’?

These five techniques to ‘manage up’ will help you lay the groundwork for a good working relationship with your boss. Then when you next need to give your boss honest feedback, they will be ready to listen to you. If you’re interested in learning more about giving feedback to your boss, I recommend this Harvard Business Review article.

References:

Marc Hurwitz, Samatha Hurwitz, Leadership is Half the Story: A Fresh Look at Followership, Leadership, and Collaboration, (Canada: University of Toronto Press, 2015).

Related content…